The Magic Formula: Why Community is Your Greatest Act of Self-Care

Welcome back to the Choices Podcast! We often come together to talk about the choices that shape our lives, and in doing so, we’ve realized a profound truth: this podcast is growing into a massive group therapy session on steroids.

It’s a space where we are constantly learning by teaching, a dynamic process of growth and self-discovery. As one of us (Carcass) noted, “The best way to learn is to teach.” And that is exactly what this journey—and life itself—is all about.

What U2 Taught Us About Connection

We started this week’s discussion by reflecting on a powerful lyric from U2’s “One”: “We are one, but we’re not the same. We get to carry each other.”

This line cuts straight to the heart of what it means to be human. We hurt each other, we disappoint each other, and sometimes we try to blame others to make things “easier” on ourselves. But in the end, we are fundamentally connected.

The band asks a deeper question: Have you come here to “play Jesus to the lepers in your head?” This suggests that sometimes the answer to our biggest issues is simple—like the touch that healed the lepers in the Bible—but we insist on complicating it. Instead of forming a simple bond of community, we often work against each other.

The Crisis of Isolation

The world can be a dark and lonely place when people lose their sense of purpose. We shared a heartbreaking story about a beautiful young girl who took her own life, a devastating echo of her father’s choice years before. This is the tragic result of a life unanchored.

We weren’t sent to Earth to do this on our own. We have families, churches, schools, and communities for a reason: they are supposed to be rallying points for all of us. But when someone retreats into isolation, whether through addiction, depression, or simply losing their way, the first thing to suffer is their connection to that vital network.

This is why, at 67, one of the greatest joys is being more engaged than ever with kids, friends, and the community. The secret? You have to get out of yourself long enough to consider the “magic formula” of what’s going to work.

The Path to Reconnection: Look In, Then Reach Out

The journey back to purpose and connection often begins with small, daily choices.

1. The Daily Devotional and Mindful Practice

You can’t just read the law—you have to study it. The same principle applies to your spiritual and mental health. A great starting point is committing to a positive routine. For one of us, listening to a daily devotional (Shane and Shane in the morning) has been a “sense of community” that starts the day right, leading to better behavior, less negativity, and increased kindness.

Like-mindedness in a community (like a book club or a workout partner) is essential. It provides accountability and helps you build trust.

2. Find Your Passion and Serve

What truly feeds your soul? Whether it’s art, music, or a charity, finding your passion is the best way to get out of your head.

• Serving the Vulnerable: One of us is involved with the Austin Street Shelter and the local SPCA, which works to foster pets for owners who are going into addiction treatment. It’s a simple, profound service that literally removes a major obstacle for people trying to save their lives.
• Connecting Globally: Another found a passion in internet radio, curating music and connecting with a global audience—from soldiers overseas to listeners in China and Australia.

3. Seek Experiences Over Stuff

We all accumulate “stuff,” but when life is done, what you truly take with you is your integrity, your intellect, and your emotion. A powerful question to ask yourself is: “Would you rather have stuff or would you rather have experiences?”

The experiences—the surprise visit to a loved one, the spontaneous trip, the moment of deep connection—become the “forever thought” in your head.

Your Challenge: Get Out and Grow

The growth you seek doesn’t happen in the “app world” or on social media; it happens face-to-face, in the trenches of real life. It’s like weight training—you’re never going to get stronger if you don’t add weight and stretch yourself.

The world needs you to make a difference, and we all need a helping hand at some point in our lives.

For this week, here is our challenge to you:

Do one thing to get out of your house and give back to the community, whatever that is. Go to church, volunteer, help a neighbor, or give a stranger a rose. Do one thing to get out of yourself, and let’s see how your world grows.

We leave you with a quote from Helen Keller, a woman who understood the meaning of true connection better than anyone:

“Alone, we can do so little. Together, we can do so much.”

Keep creating that community, keep showing that compassion, and keep carrying each other. We’ll be back next week to hear how it went.

What’s one thing you can commit to doing this week to get out of yourself and connect with your community?